This is the improved version. I am in the process of editing the novel before sending it off to beta readers. Overall, grammar and sentence structure has been improved, as well as smaller improvements to accompany those.
Overall, this prologue now has a much better feel to it.
--Chapter One: [link]
I originally wrote this last Thursday, but decided to refrain from posting it until today, December 23rd, because it is my third anniversary here on deviantArt and this piece means a lot to me, which made it the perfect time to post. Yes, for many it is still the 22nd; I'm posting this at nearly 00:30 in Germany, so for me it is already the 23rd.
On September 30th, 2008, I started writing a novel. Over the past years that novel has expanded into a multi-part series. Even so, progress on it has halted for over a year as my writing matured and I found myself realizing the novel was... immature, poorly written and not at all up to my current standards. There were glaring plotholes that I needed to fix, but was unaware of how to do so.
Nearly a month ago, my muse helped me solve that problem. This prologue is the start of the first novel in the series, which will not focus on the main character himself; instead, it focuses on his origin. This was what I needed to fill in the blanks, fix the errors and expand it into what it should truly be.
This is my most elaborate, most dear project.
I understand that the content of this novel may not be something more religious people would like to read. However, I assure you that I do not mean to offend anyone with what I have written, nor do I intend for it to do so.
Opinions as well as feedback are greatly appreciated. Does the story play out well enough? How is the language, structure, details and setting? Is there anything you see that could be improved on?This story, characters, plotline and everything related to it are copyrighted to me and may not be used, edited, sold, or redistributed without my express written permission.